Forwarded ! My wife wants sex all the time! She refuses to do any work , either inside or outside home , I am also managing the servants and the family breadwinner !! Pleas Help !!! Please help
Dec 26, 2013, 12.00AM IST 
Times of india
Question: I am a 42-year-old man, well educated and city bred. I have been married for two years. My wife is 21-years-old from a small town and not well educated. As this was an arranged marriage between old family friends, I didn't mind. My wife wants sex all the time, and at least 3-4 times daily, apart from the night. At times I have woken up from sleep to find her on top of me. She is not interested in working, either outside or inside the house. I have been managing the servants too. All day she is busy chatting with the neighbours and once when I overheard her, it was again all about sex. Is this normal behaviour? It is definitely not what I had expected. So much of over-indulgence only in sex may be okay now, but what will happen 5-10 years down the line if she has no other interests?
- ABC
Answer: I don't think anyone has ever been able to quantify what a 'normal' sex drive is or what should be considered the normal frequency of lovemaking. So, probably anything goes, as long as it does not interfere with the rest of your life. In your particular case, the huge age gap is responsible to a large extent for the difference in perceptions regarding sex. And if you are managing to keep up the pace with your young wife, why then, you must surely be congratulated.
Even though there is a part of you that is rationalising the entire thing. Obviously, the flesh is willing even though the spirit is not! Meanwhile, instead of condemning this attitude and behaviour of hers, it would be better to let her discover all the joys and pleasures of physical gratification. And like all other good things in life, this too just might be unable to sustain itself. Thereby putting to rest your fears and apprehensions regarding the future. As for finding her on top of you, I am sure that is a welcome deviation from the routine and often-drab missionary variety! No?
- ABC
Answer: I don't think anyone has ever been able to quantify what a 'normal' sex drive is or what should be considered the normal frequency of lovemaking. So, probably anything goes, as long as it does not interfere with the rest of your life. In your particular case, the huge age gap is responsible to a large extent for the difference in perceptions regarding sex. And if you are managing to keep up the pace with your young wife, why then, you must surely be congratulated.
Even though there is a part of you that is rationalising the entire thing. Obviously, the flesh is willing even though the spirit is not! Meanwhile, instead of condemning this attitude and behaviour of hers, it would be better to let her discover all the joys and pleasures of physical gratification. And like all other good things in life, this too just might be unable to sustain itself. Thereby putting to rest your fears and apprehensions regarding the future. As for finding her on top of you, I am sure that is a welcome deviation from the routine and often-drab missionary variety! No?
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Vinayak
Father of a lovely daughter, criminal in the eyes of a wife, son of an compassionate elderly mother, old timer who hasn't given up, Male, activist
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