Saturday, August 10, 2013

second marriage worse than the first ?? 200 divorcees find second marriage pill BITTER just in pune last two years

200 divorcees find second marriage pill bitter

Wednesday, Jul 3, 2013, 1:42 IST | Place: Pune | Agency: DNA
Sandip Dighe  

Crime branch women's assistance cell approached by 100 couples in a year, who want to divorce new life partners

Some 100 couples in the city, who were previously divorcees and had remarried, have approached the women's assistance cell (WAC) of the Pune police crime branch over the last one year due to discord with their new life partners.

The WAC officers attribute the phenomenon to adamant attitude of the couple. They have observed that in most cases, the discord exists because the couples are not willing to 'adjust and compromise' with their lifestyle or because they compare the new marriage with the previous relationship.

The WAC officers claim that in almost 50% of the cases, the male partner had cheated the woman partner while remarrying by not revealing past relationships, children born out of those relationships and property details.

The WAC officers say most of these couples are in the age group of 35 to 45 years and the main factor they take into consideration while remarrying is 'future planning'.

Police inspector and incharge of WAC Smita Jadhav told dna, "In many cases, remarried couples having marital discord have told us that they decided to remarry because they felt lonely after divorce and wanted to have company for the remaining life. In many cases, divorced women were reluctant to remarry but were convinced by parents. Because of this, they find it difficult coping with even a small problem in the new relationship and tend to take extreme steps."

According to Jadhav, "Money has not been a major factor of discord among such couples. We have observed that many couples are working professionals from well-off families."

Citing a recent case, Jadhav said, "A 45-year-old divorced man remarried a 40-year-old divorcee two years ago. After the marriage, the woman came to know that the man had transferred his property in the name of children born out of an earlier marriage. She felt he was not thinking of her future and was giving more time to his children from the previous marriage. Then she started feeling betrayed and approached us. She wanted immediate divorce."

Jadhav said the WAC has now assigned four counsellors including a man to counsel such couples. "We try to sort out the problems mutually. However, many couples are not in a mood to listen to us," she said.

Jadhav said another major reason for domestic discord is that in many cases men did not reveal their past when they remarry. She added, "We have seen in many cases, divorced men hide about their first marriage and betray the women they marry."

Giving an example, Jadhav said, "A woman who worked in Marathi film industry and TV serials was divorced in 2004. Later, she came in contact with a man through  mutual friends. The man proposed marriage and they married in July 2010 after her parents agreed. They went to live in Andheri, Mumbai but after a couple of months, she found that his claim that he had divorced his first wife was false. When she confronted him, he simply said he did not tell her about it fearing she would turn down his proposal."

In many cases, the couples seek a divorce on grounds of mutual consent. It's a faster and hassle free, besides both parties can file divorce petitions. Jadhav said, "In such cases, the couple live separated for six months and then file for divorce with mutual consent. The judge hears both sides and grants divorce. In such cases, it takes about a year to secure divorce."

Jadhav also claimed that incompatibility and lack of adjustment are key reasons for the increase in the number of divorce cases among the couples.


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